 
Location: Manhattan
Event: The 1999 CMJ Music Fest
Our Mission: Raid the show for every bit of free junk we can get!
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Every year the odd melange of hipsters and dorm room introverts that make up the US college music scene descends on the Big Apple for the CMJ Music Marathon. CMJ is the College Music Journal, a publishing empire (well, ok, two magazines) that cover what they call "the new music scene." Started in 1979 in some guys parents’ basement, CMJ is now a viable media force in the bloated, decaying music industry. What better way to expose the inner workings of this allegedly hip Star Chamber than to infiltrate its ranks, and report on what we find?
Shock the Monkey
Looking over the promotional materials for the CMJ Music Fest, we noticed that the event itself had been sold to a sponsor. It was now the G-Shock CMJ Music Fest. Maybe we ought to get a sponsor as well. Perhaps The Tampax FI CMJ Report. Or maybe Lactaid Milk Presents: FI Does CMJ. We have our top people looking into it right now.
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Raiders of the Lost Freebee
Journal Entry: August 30, 1999 11:00AM
Roll in at 11, after a night of imported beer and experimental television. It’s now a little more than two weeks before CMJ. Our quest has begun. The first step--procuring our CMJ press passes. We contacted them back in June, trying to beat the rush. Every time we make some headway there, the guy we’re talking to leaves and we’re back to square one. Maybe they’re on to our secret plan to secure 37 press passes and then sell them to high school kids looking for free drinks or 30-year-old PR people looking for a hipness infusion. You know, the kind who think Pavement are uber-alternative.
Journal Entry: August 30, 1999 1:23 PM
My dreams are haunted with images of a mysterious man. |
A man named Lowell Chase. Who is this enigmatic figure? He’s our current "contact" at CMJ, and we’ve been trying to wrangle our press passes from him for months.
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Our last transmission from this overlord of media access was this enigmatic message:
From: Lowell Chase
Sent: Monday, August 09, 1999 5:53 PM
To: 'Eric Eckstein'
Subject: RE: CMJ Press Passes
Eric-
Yes I received your fax. We will be processing all the requests within the next few weeks - no passes have yet been distributed. Thanks.
Lowell Chase
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Perhaps the powers that be at CMJ were on to our plans to disrupt the proceedings and this was their way of putting us off until they could figure out what to do with us. FI is a legitimate media outlet after all, so there was no real reason they could give for keeping us out of the conference.
While passing the time, I decided to look over the band list. Who were we going to try and see? Chances are, any popular act would be packed solid and very hard to get into. You can imagine thousands of people lined up to see the Foo Fighters at some club, while 300 unknown bands played to empty bars.
Journal Entry: September 8, 1999 3:20 PM
After many voicemail e-mail messages, we finally got to speak to one Mr. Lowell Chase in person. Sadly, our conversation did not go exactly as planned. |
Claiming that the powers that be at CMJ had decided to close ranks and tighten press access to the show, he offered us one press pass out of the four we had requested. Of course, this was unacceptable. How could we wreak havoc and destroy the music industry from within if we couldn’t even get past the front door?
Dan’s Rule Number One for Getting Press Access: Hit ‘em where it hurts. We threatened to drop our all our coverage of CMJ if we didn’t get the access we wanted. This was just the button we needed to push and Lowell backed off, promising to try and get us in.
Journal Entry: September 9, 1999 10:00 AM
Victory! We’ve been granted press access to show so secretive, only members of that ultra-restrictive caste known as college radio DJs are usually allowed in. Imagine, to mix and mingle with the best and brightest our nation’s campuses have to offer… It boggles the mind.
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The Big Show: September 15, 1999 to September 18, 1999
We’re here! And so is hurricane Floyd! The show itself is surprisingly small, just one hall filled with exhibitor booths and several panel discussion rooms. There’s a small stage set up in the back for bands to play, but we’ve got more important things on our minds. Step one, make our way top the back of the hall to pick our official CMJ goodie bags filled with CDs, flyers and other knick-knacks.
It’s a good start, but from here on in, it’s up to us. We quickly fan out and make our way from booth to booth, scamming and smooth-talking our way into the hearts and minds of the exhibitors.
Click here to see our detailed Free Stuff Report |
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